Poochy Ponders: To Tell or Not to Tell

Poochy Ponders

That's today's ponder. While I am no Hamlet, debating on whether you tell people you've had weight loss surgery is a heavy subject.  Since my surgery, I've had six friends have one procedure or the other and the topic of telling people is always at the top.

I personally, share my story as I feel it's a way to Pay it Forward to the next person.  I've always been pretty open where no question is off-limits.  It's a personal decision.  I have in the last year encountered situations where I felt uneasy sharing my surgery story.  I've realized that you really have to trust the person.  When my wellness coach asked me to tape a testimonial for their website, I did it to Pay it Forward; but when I found out that they wanted to share it with the entire company I work for, I freaked out.  In that situation, I was able to figure out why.  I was afraid of what other's might think or how they would judge me or what they would say if they saw me eating a wrong food in the cafeteria.  I didn't want them to hold me accountable.  It took me a long time to work through the fear.  I knew that it was another test of how far I'd come and that I can be empowered by it rather than hindered.  They shared the video and I never heard anything from anyone except praise and kindness and those that were mean - I don't know about or care.  They have their own demons if they're worried about mine.

Recently, I was thinking about the future and flash-forward 10 years from now with new people that have crossed my path. Is there really a need to tell the story? Are you really still living in a fat-minded body by continuing to tell your story? If so, how can I continue to Pay it Forward if I stop the story.

I'm interested in what you think about this. Do you tell your story? Who do you tell? Who do you not tell. When do you stop telling? That is the question. 

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Pre New Year Challenge

Have you read this woman's blog? If you haven't, you're missing out. Holly had the same surgery I did, the VSG, and she looks amazing!  I know first-hand the struggles a 400 pound body has and if you haven't read her story, please do.  I know there are parts that I could totally pick myself out in and I'm sure you could too.  Holly wrote about a challenge called "Throw a Wrench in it" and how there are 7 days before Christmas and New Years. I can't give it justice so please stop over and read it.  It's powerful.  I'd been using this nasty cold as an excuse to not get off my duff and move and with Holly's inspiration I pulled out my "still in the package" Bob Harper Power Band and did the first set for beginner's.  Thank you Holly, I feel great! Are you using the same old excuse year after year to wait for the New Year? Come on throw a wrench in it and get off your duff!

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This Is My Story

My name is Mary and my alter-ego is Poochy.  I would like to say I was born fat but I left my mother's womb at a normal 7 pounds 6 ounces.  I didn't start to see an issue with my weight until I was about 4 or 5 years old.  I could safely say that I was one of the fattest girls in my class throughout grade and high school notwithstanding that little bout at the beginning of 7th grade when I'd lost weight over the summer.  It's funny how I knew the secret to weight loss back then and and still thirty some years later like to fight it. Eat less and move more. How boring, right?

I've tried a ton of diets even at a young age.  I think my first Weight Watchers meeting was around 10 years old and then there was TOPS and when Jane Fonda had me making it burn, I was busy analyzing if taking laxatives to lose weight was really that dangerous.

I have spent tons of money on diet products from hypnotists, Deal a Meal, books....OMG do I have books!  I never did diet pills much maybe once or twice and I never had my jaw wired shut because when I was researching that, I realized that I, too, could suck raw cookie dough through a straw if I really wanted to.

I'm now on this new weight loss surgery kick.  I had the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy (VSG) in October of 2011 weighing in at 431.2 pounds and I'm down roughly 150 pounds.  It's by far twice the most weight I've ever lost.  I'm in the 2nd year with my opportunity to lose closing in and I need to make sure that I don't lose my focus.  You know that phrase I wrote above... Eat less and move more.

Some days I do really good and others well, I'm normal.  I like my Reese Peanut Butter Cups just like some of you do.  I definitely move more but I'm not a gym rat.  I am fortunate to have a wellness trainer where I work and he's so proud of me, he asked me to shoot a video for their website.  He's also the one that told me to buy the little black dress and to not give a damn what other's may think. Wow was he right!  I never had so much attention.  I felt like a million bucks.   I often tell him that I wish he was that little guy on my right shoulder shouting these things to me every time my inner-voice keeps trying to tell me the opposite.

The Little Black Dress
279 pounds December 2012
152 pounds lost. 

My goal weight is between 140 and 150 pounds but I really try to not concentrate on the number on the scale, there's so much more important things like Reese Peanut Butter Cups  living life and doing what makes you happy.  It really is important.  I've spent so many years trying to figure out what made me fat that I could write about it for the next 50 years or so.  If only I had concentrated on what truly makes me happy and then doing it.  I encourage you to do the same.  Dig down deep and find your happy.  I promise it will make your journey so much easier.

I should admit my downfalls... let's see you know about the Peanut Butter cups and no, I do not like them with my eggs.  Catsup or Ketchup is for eggs. I suffer from Squirrel Syndrome - dogs playing frisbee sees a squirrel and runs... that's me. It is also known as "something shiny syndrome"  I will try to stay on topic but I can't make any promises.  Especially, if Shameless is on Showtime or Jax does something on Son's of Anarchy, or I must rant or rave about The Biggest Loser.

I have a family.  A super, great family.  I am on my second and last marriage for the last 4 years.  He would have been my first, but he wasn't old enough.  That officially makes me a cougar. He brought to the marriage two wonderful children I have the pleasure of helping raise.  We are a normal family that fights one minute and loves the next.  My husband has a few television obsessions as well.  The Food Network being one. I fondly refer to it as Food Porn and the second, being Dr. Phil.  I haven't nicknamed this obsession yet, because I can't gauge how long it will last...

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Weight Loss Surgery Saved My Life

Weight loss surgery (WLS)  is a very personal decision.  It was a decision that I made that definitely saved my life.  There are many misconceptions out there good and bad.  I can tell you first hand that it is not the "magic pill" everyone wishes they had to control their weight.  It is not the "cure all" of life's problems.  Definitely, it is not the "easy way out".  After surgery, you still have to watch what you eat by monitoring your protein intake, your calorie intake, and you water intake.  Living after weight loss surgery is probably the strictest diet you've ever been on because it's a life-long process. Your odds of success are really no better than any other diet out there. Did you know that after 5 years, 50% of the people who have had weight loss surgery usually gain 50% or more of their weight back? Did you know that your opportunity to lose your most weight is in the first two years following surgery and then it's up to you to do it the old-fashioned way?

My journey prior to surgery began in February 2011.  I had decided to have the sleeve procedure done. This is also known as the VSG or Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Twice before, I had attempted to have it done and both times would find excuses that would allow me to stop the process.  Something happened to me at the start of 2011 and I can't quite pin point what it was to make me do it this time, and really, the why, doesn't matter.  My insurance company made me jump through hoops as well as my surgeon. I had to have six months of physician monitoring, weight management classes, nutrition classes, and even visited a psychologist.  During this process, I ended up firing my regular physician, and found a new one that was on board with my wishes 100 percent.  As I reflect back on my journey, I can tell you I had many opportunities to throw the towel in again.  I am so glad I didn't.

My surgeon told me that I'd regret having the surgery at least three times.  Right after surgery, a month after surgery, and about six months after surgery.  I never did.

Right after surgery, I was just thankful to be alive.  My biggest fear was dying on the operating table and when I realized I had woke up, I was just thankful to have a heart beat.  I didn't have much pain either, which surprised me.  A month after surgery, I was feeling a little cooped up from being on medical leave but regrets? No way! Finally, at six months- I must not have because I was too busy living and loving life!

If you're considering weight loss surgery and have any questions, I'd be happy to share with you what I know from the patient prospective.  I am not a physician and certainly encourage you to discuss having WLS with your physician as well. You may email me here or join the forums here and post your question under "Ask Poochy"

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