Top 10 Steps to a New You in 2013

Do you remember December 31, 1999 when everyone said the world would change at the stroke of midnight and all our technology would go to hell?   What about just a few days ago when the world was going to end, yet again? Well this year, 2013, I am going to stick my neck out on a limb and say this is the year you succeed!

Here are the top 10 steps I took in 2012 - I'm happier, focused and going to be even more successful in 2013.  You can be too!

1.  Find your happy and do it.  What do you truly live for? What gives you that tingly feeling?
2. Discover an exercise you really enjoy or look forward to.  If it's playing catch in the back yard or   dancing to your favorite music, do it!  Exercise doesn't have to be painful. As long as you're moving, you're burning calories.
3.  Quit looking for the "why" - the why doesn't matter. It can provide insight but the answer will never fix the problem.
4.  Choose your thoughts.  If you focus on the positive, your behavior will follow.  What you think affects how you feel and what you do.
5.  Find your comfort.  Food is not it.  As a child, I was comforted by my mother with food while my father would be raging drunk in the other room.  I associated food with comfort.  As an adult when ever I needed comfort, I turned to food.  It's a vicious cycle and a learned behavior.  Find other ways to comfort yourself.  If you're feeling alone, get with friends.  If you're angry, go for a walk and clear your mind.  Don't turn to food.  Food is not your friend and will never give you comfort.
6.  Love yourself.  No one will ever love you like you should love yourself.  Be kind to yourself.
7.  You only have to worry about today.  If that's too much do it by the hour and so on.  Sometimes the focus on "the rest of your life" can drown you.  As the days add up, you'll have created new habits and a new way of life,.
8.  Take responsibility and stop making excuses.  An excuse is only a way to permit yourself to have a certain behavior.  You're an adult - admit your shortfall and be responsible.
9.  Don't worry about what others are saying or thinking.  First, they're probably not thinking what you think they are and second, they're going to do it any way.  From now on, your give a damn is busted.
10.  Nurture yourself with what makes you feel good.  Is it make up? Is it jewelry? Maybe it's a long hot bubble bath.  Take care of you.

Remember, There is nothing selfish about taking care of YOU.  

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Find Your Happy

I spent a lot of years pondering the reason I was fat and why I abused food.  I blamed my alcoholic father, my dieting obsessed mother, the kids who teased me in school, the boy who broke my heart, and the list could go on and on and on.  Today, if I let myself, I could make excuses every time I don't eat enough protein, have an extra peanut butter cup, or miss my vitamins.

I always thought that if I figured out the "why", I could fix it.  I now know that the "why" doesn't matter. Once I gave myself permission to not worry about the "why" things started to click.  I abuse food.  I have to change that no matter why I do it.  I am fat. I have to change that no matter why I am.  Sure, I may have learned to binge to cope with problems or reward myself with food from my mother but at some point, I became an adult and I am now responsible for my own actions.

I also thought that if I could just reach my goal weight, I would be happy.  You can choose to be happy now.  If you're waiting for permission, you have mine. It's ok to be happy.

I've mentioned peanut butter cups a lot on this blog already and there is a reason for it.  My wellness coach helped me see that it's important to find out what makes you happy.  For him, an Olive burger from Smashburger does it for him.  For me, it's peanut butter cups. We don't eat them every day but occassionally, we do.  They make us happy.

Playing with my kids and taking them to events make me happy.  At 400 pounds you don't do much but sit on sidelines and watch life pass you by.  Having that kind of life did not make me happy.

I've learned that taking a walk around the block really helps me clear my mind and regain focus.  I don't go for a walk to exercise.  Exercise is just a benefit.  Walking makes me happy.

I've learned I love date night with my husband.  I no longer dread that energy it takes to get ready and be out in public.  My husband makes me happy.

I've learned that wearing make up and jewelry make me happy.  I wear it often as I don't feel happy without it.  It reminds me of my past when I didn't have the energy or the desire to pamper myself. Don't mistake this for it makes me feel pretty. I am pretty with or without make up and jewelry. :) Pampering myself makes me happy.

I've learned I love to make jewelry.  I took a class and plan to make more.  Being creative makes me happy.

I've learned that I love doing volunteer work.  Helping others makes me happy.

This winter I am going to go sledding with my son and rather than sit and watch from the car or stay home while his dad takes him, I'm going to go sledding down the hill with him.  If I break my leg, I won't be happy but I'll be creating memories that will make us happy for a lifetime.

I used to think that all food and great quantities of food would make me happy. It would fill the void of whatever was happening in the moment. Unfortunately, it hindered the happy in the future.

Figure out your happy.  You can be happy now no matter what weight you are or where you're at in this journey.  I can honestly say that if I never lose another pound, I am happy and love myself and my life. See, that's why this is working.  I wasn't fixing the right problem, and created another one in it's place.
Bottom line, eat less and move more.  If you need help, get it.  You have to put yourself first before you can do for others. You are worth it, you deserve it and you deserve to be happy.

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Weight Loss Surgery Saved My Life

Weight loss surgery (WLS)  is a very personal decision.  It was a decision that I made that definitely saved my life.  There are many misconceptions out there good and bad.  I can tell you first hand that it is not the "magic pill" everyone wishes they had to control their weight.  It is not the "cure all" of life's problems.  Definitely, it is not the "easy way out".  After surgery, you still have to watch what you eat by monitoring your protein intake, your calorie intake, and you water intake.  Living after weight loss surgery is probably the strictest diet you've ever been on because it's a life-long process. Your odds of success are really no better than any other diet out there. Did you know that after 5 years, 50% of the people who have had weight loss surgery usually gain 50% or more of their weight back? Did you know that your opportunity to lose your most weight is in the first two years following surgery and then it's up to you to do it the old-fashioned way?

My journey prior to surgery began in February 2011.  I had decided to have the sleeve procedure done. This is also known as the VSG or Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. Twice before, I had attempted to have it done and both times would find excuses that would allow me to stop the process.  Something happened to me at the start of 2011 and I can't quite pin point what it was to make me do it this time, and really, the why, doesn't matter.  My insurance company made me jump through hoops as well as my surgeon. I had to have six months of physician monitoring, weight management classes, nutrition classes, and even visited a psychologist.  During this process, I ended up firing my regular physician, and found a new one that was on board with my wishes 100 percent.  As I reflect back on my journey, I can tell you I had many opportunities to throw the towel in again.  I am so glad I didn't.

My surgeon told me that I'd regret having the surgery at least three times.  Right after surgery, a month after surgery, and about six months after surgery.  I never did.

Right after surgery, I was just thankful to be alive.  My biggest fear was dying on the operating table and when I realized I had woke up, I was just thankful to have a heart beat.  I didn't have much pain either, which surprised me.  A month after surgery, I was feeling a little cooped up from being on medical leave but regrets? No way! Finally, at six months- I must not have because I was too busy living and loving life!

If you're considering weight loss surgery and have any questions, I'd be happy to share with you what I know from the patient prospective.  I am not a physician and certainly encourage you to discuss having WLS with your physician as well. You may email me here or join the forums here and post your question under "Ask Poochy"

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