The Day After the Gumball Dropped

I really enjoyed my last day of vacation with my family today. 

For breakfast, hubby made a full course.  I enjoyed a 1/2 piece of toast with about a teaspoon of peanut butter, 1 turkey sausage patty, 1 scrambled egg (with catsup) and about a tablespoon of hash browns.  All for 245 calories and 18 grams of protein.  The sausage patties were new to our house and they were pretty good.  I would have preferred a little spicier but nothing a dash of Red Hot won't fix.  

8 grams of Protein per Patty

 

 My four year old, "K", helped me make dinner today and she turned her nose up at every turn.  Especially at the mushrooms I covered the main course with.  She exclaimed she was not going to eat that and I explained to her that sometimes we have to eat things that are better for us in order to eat the other things we really like to eat.  She wasn't buying that so I reminded her that yesterday she got to pick Chicken nuggets for dinner and tonight it was my turn to pick.  She seemed to accept that a little easier.  

She was obsessed with the ball dropping last night or the "gumball" as she referred to it.  She was out like a light within 20 minutes after the stroke of midnight.  Bless her heart, she was a trooper.  She spent a good deal of the day wanting to play "Happy New Year" all over again.  

My hubby went to the store and picked me up some new Greek yogurt I haven't tried.  I'll let you know how it pans out.  I'm not a big fan of Greek yogurt but I sacrifice for the protein punch it gives me.  One day, I too, shall find one I like or resort to throwing in a 1/2 scoop of unflavored protein into a low-fat one.  

Tomorrow, on the blog,  I am starting a series of "Following the Golden Road to Happiness.  There will be five posts throughout the week.  I'm excited for you to join me on the journey!  It's inter-active, so I'm excited to see your responses.  

I'm going to wind down the rest of my evening watching some television with my family and visiting some other blogs.  TLC is re-running My 600 Pound Life if you haven't seen it, it's amazing.  

With that, I leave you a picture of Poochy, part of the inspiration that created this blog. 

Poochy

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Poochy Ponders: To Tell or Not to Tell

Poochy Ponders

That's today's ponder. While I am no Hamlet, debating on whether you tell people you've had weight loss surgery is a heavy subject.  Since my surgery, I've had six friends have one procedure or the other and the topic of telling people is always at the top.

I personally, share my story as I feel it's a way to Pay it Forward to the next person.  I've always been pretty open where no question is off-limits.  It's a personal decision.  I have in the last year encountered situations where I felt uneasy sharing my surgery story.  I've realized that you really have to trust the person.  When my wellness coach asked me to tape a testimonial for their website, I did it to Pay it Forward; but when I found out that they wanted to share it with the entire company I work for, I freaked out.  In that situation, I was able to figure out why.  I was afraid of what other's might think or how they would judge me or what they would say if they saw me eating a wrong food in the cafeteria.  I didn't want them to hold me accountable.  It took me a long time to work through the fear.  I knew that it was another test of how far I'd come and that I can be empowered by it rather than hindered.  They shared the video and I never heard anything from anyone except praise and kindness and those that were mean - I don't know about or care.  They have their own demons if they're worried about mine.

Recently, I was thinking about the future and flash-forward 10 years from now with new people that have crossed my path. Is there really a need to tell the story? Are you really still living in a fat-minded body by continuing to tell your story? If so, how can I continue to Pay it Forward if I stop the story.

I'm interested in what you think about this. Do you tell your story? Who do you tell? Who do you not tell. When do you stop telling? That is the question. 

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Top 10 Steps to a New You in 2013

Do you remember December 31, 1999 when everyone said the world would change at the stroke of midnight and all our technology would go to hell?   What about just a few days ago when the world was going to end, yet again? Well this year, 2013, I am going to stick my neck out on a limb and say this is the year you succeed!

Here are the top 10 steps I took in 2012 - I'm happier, focused and going to be even more successful in 2013.  You can be too!

1.  Find your happy and do it.  What do you truly live for? What gives you that tingly feeling?
2. Discover an exercise you really enjoy or look forward to.  If it's playing catch in the back yard or   dancing to your favorite music, do it!  Exercise doesn't have to be painful. As long as you're moving, you're burning calories.
3.  Quit looking for the "why" - the why doesn't matter. It can provide insight but the answer will never fix the problem.
4.  Choose your thoughts.  If you focus on the positive, your behavior will follow.  What you think affects how you feel and what you do.
5.  Find your comfort.  Food is not it.  As a child, I was comforted by my mother with food while my father would be raging drunk in the other room.  I associated food with comfort.  As an adult when ever I needed comfort, I turned to food.  It's a vicious cycle and a learned behavior.  Find other ways to comfort yourself.  If you're feeling alone, get with friends.  If you're angry, go for a walk and clear your mind.  Don't turn to food.  Food is not your friend and will never give you comfort.
6.  Love yourself.  No one will ever love you like you should love yourself.  Be kind to yourself.
7.  You only have to worry about today.  If that's too much do it by the hour and so on.  Sometimes the focus on "the rest of your life" can drown you.  As the days add up, you'll have created new habits and a new way of life,.
8.  Take responsibility and stop making excuses.  An excuse is only a way to permit yourself to have a certain behavior.  You're an adult - admit your shortfall and be responsible.
9.  Don't worry about what others are saying or thinking.  First, they're probably not thinking what you think they are and second, they're going to do it any way.  From now on, your give a damn is busted.
10.  Nurture yourself with what makes you feel good.  Is it make up? Is it jewelry? Maybe it's a long hot bubble bath.  Take care of you.

Remember, There is nothing selfish about taking care of YOU.  

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This Is My Story

My name is Mary and my alter-ego is Poochy.  I would like to say I was born fat but I left my mother's womb at a normal 7 pounds 6 ounces.  I didn't start to see an issue with my weight until I was about 4 or 5 years old.  I could safely say that I was one of the fattest girls in my class throughout grade and high school notwithstanding that little bout at the beginning of 7th grade when I'd lost weight over the summer.  It's funny how I knew the secret to weight loss back then and and still thirty some years later like to fight it. Eat less and move more. How boring, right?

I've tried a ton of diets even at a young age.  I think my first Weight Watchers meeting was around 10 years old and then there was TOPS and when Jane Fonda had me making it burn, I was busy analyzing if taking laxatives to lose weight was really that dangerous.

I have spent tons of money on diet products from hypnotists, Deal a Meal, books....OMG do I have books!  I never did diet pills much maybe once or twice and I never had my jaw wired shut because when I was researching that, I realized that I, too, could suck raw cookie dough through a straw if I really wanted to.

I'm now on this new weight loss surgery kick.  I had the Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy (VSG) in October of 2011 weighing in at 431.2 pounds and I'm down roughly 150 pounds.  It's by far twice the most weight I've ever lost.  I'm in the 2nd year with my opportunity to lose closing in and I need to make sure that I don't lose my focus.  You know that phrase I wrote above... Eat less and move more.

Some days I do really good and others well, I'm normal.  I like my Reese Peanut Butter Cups just like some of you do.  I definitely move more but I'm not a gym rat.  I am fortunate to have a wellness trainer where I work and he's so proud of me, he asked me to shoot a video for their website.  He's also the one that told me to buy the little black dress and to not give a damn what other's may think. Wow was he right!  I never had so much attention.  I felt like a million bucks.   I often tell him that I wish he was that little guy on my right shoulder shouting these things to me every time my inner-voice keeps trying to tell me the opposite.

The Little Black Dress
279 pounds December 2012
152 pounds lost. 

My goal weight is between 140 and 150 pounds but I really try to not concentrate on the number on the scale, there's so much more important things like Reese Peanut Butter Cups  living life and doing what makes you happy.  It really is important.  I've spent so many years trying to figure out what made me fat that I could write about it for the next 50 years or so.  If only I had concentrated on what truly makes me happy and then doing it.  I encourage you to do the same.  Dig down deep and find your happy.  I promise it will make your journey so much easier.

I should admit my downfalls... let's see you know about the Peanut Butter cups and no, I do not like them with my eggs.  Catsup or Ketchup is for eggs. I suffer from Squirrel Syndrome - dogs playing frisbee sees a squirrel and runs... that's me. It is also known as "something shiny syndrome"  I will try to stay on topic but I can't make any promises.  Especially, if Shameless is on Showtime or Jax does something on Son's of Anarchy, or I must rant or rave about The Biggest Loser.

I have a family.  A super, great family.  I am on my second and last marriage for the last 4 years.  He would have been my first, but he wasn't old enough.  That officially makes me a cougar. He brought to the marriage two wonderful children I have the pleasure of helping raise.  We are a normal family that fights one minute and loves the next.  My husband has a few television obsessions as well.  The Food Network being one. I fondly refer to it as Food Porn and the second, being Dr. Phil.  I haven't nicknamed this obsession yet, because I can't gauge how long it will last...

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I am Poochy Ponders

There are several reasons I named my blog Poochy Ponders.  I had wanted to use the name Poochy, originally, because of the little bear I was given in the hospital before having weight loss surgery.  It was intended to shield the pain after surgery much like a heart patient is given to use.  I had named him Poochy after reading so many blogs about weight loss surgery and blogger's referring to their new pouches, a.k.a. their stomach.

Ponders was easy.  I ponder a lot.  I've spent many years mulling over the reason I was fat.  Should I blame my mother? My father? Did I have a thyroid problem? Was I just big boned? The reasons were endless.  Nowadays, I ponder how to make this my best life, sorting through the garbage in my head, and most of all doing what makes me happy.

After much thought, I decided that if I was going to use the name Poochy, I had better make sure it doesn't mean something outlandish or embarrassing.  Little did I know, it was the perfect name for this blog because the Urban Dictionary described me to a "T" in my past life.  Continuing to believe there wasn't a problem, only helped me reach over 400 pounds.    Can you pick out which definition I fall under?

 Definition 1: 

a not so fat but not so skinny person; usually they think they aren't fat and call themselves "big boned," or they make up some excuse that it's in their genes; sometimes referred to as "lards"

The poochy girl went to the nearest McDonald's and bought a salad, and a diet coke along with a big mac... and a double cheeseburger... and a double quarter pounder, then spent the night there feasting. 

Definition 2: 

To be burnt out after a big spliff

Man that joint made me totally poochy.

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